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Rabble Without a Cause

Tuesday, June 21 2011

So You Think You Can Govern? The Much-Needed Political Equivalent of ‘So You Think You Can Dance’

What reality television has done for prime time programming it can also do for presidential politics.


Monday, April 18 2011

Martyrdom and the Marketing of the Afterlife

Considering the Afterlife as an eternal baseball game illuminates why 72 virgins might not be the ideal final reward.


Sunday, February 6 2011

One Nation, OMG

Agreeing to disagree doesn’t make your argument less 'right' -- but it does make it more reasonable.


Sunday, October 31 2010

Sweeping Clean the US Elections May Require a New Broom: Why Not Elect a Witch?

There are reasons to dismiss Christine O'Donnell's candidacy, but witchcraft shouldn't be one of them.


Thursday, July 22 2010

Sarah Palin’s Creative Vocabulization

Armchair pundits lit up the blogosphere when Sarah Palin tweeted a non-word. Don't we have more important things to worry about?


Sunday, July 11 2010

Birth of a Nation (Cesarean Delivery)

How long must the Gulf Coast suffer before we reconsider the humanitarian upside of southern secession?


Sunday, May 16 2010

Is Social Networking the Future of Voting?

Imagine new legislation on every voter's Facebook homepage: voters could click on the post to learn more about it, add a comment to the discussion (140 character limit), and then click "Like" or "Dislike". Click. Click. Done!


Tuesday, March 2 2010

Result Not Typical: Improving Political Marketing

The US government is cracking down on misleading advertising; shouldn't political propaganda be included in the discussion?


Sunday, November 8 2009

Table Space: The Final Frontier

The impressive part of 2001: A Space Odyssey isn’t what they have in the future, it’s what they don’t have: clutter.


Sunday, September 13 2009

Deconstructing the Clap

Rock music is the only art form that invites amateurs to perform along with the professionals – like an oversize version of Kumbaya -- and with predictable results.


Sunday, March 8 2009

Bailing Out the Bailout

To help pay back the debt, we may need President Obama to wear an actual UPS uniform for the “delivery” of his next State of the Union speech.


Sunday, February 8 2009

Shirt Happens

Are CNN journalists writing news headlines these days, or t-shirt slogans?


Tuesday, November 18 2008

One Last Legacy for Bush

With George W. Bush eager for a way to salvage his legacy, perhaps we can throw him a bone in the name of Homeland Security.


Thursday, October 9 2008

The Manitobian Candidate

Have shadowy forces spent years preparing a puppet candidate who will support their causes? Yes -- and you’ll be surprised who’s pulling the strings.


Thursday, September 11 2008

I’ll Swap You Two Wydens for a Biden

Getting America’s youth to pay attention to politics doesn’t require a change in message, but a change in messenger -- baseball card style.


Monday, August 25 2008

Hope, Fear and Marketing

It’s more than mere semantics that one US presidential candidate has taken “hope” as his own concept. Is “fear” showing signs of fatigue as effective voter motivation?


Monday, July 21 2008

Let’s Spice-up the 2008 Election, Iron Chef-Style

Chefs quickly manage a range of dishes, their staff swiftly execute, and the result must be excellent. Let's put McCain and Obama in aprons to see how they might really work.


Wednesday, June 11 2008

Fixing What’s Wrong with the Bill of Rights

So that no future US president skips over the fine, excessively wordy print, I recommend we update the Bill of Rights so it sounds a bit more, shall we say, awesome.


Wednesday, May 7 2008

Vote for the Prettiest

US presidential elections are suspiciously like high school popularity contests, er, elections -- it's not who you know, it's who knows you.


Monday, April 7 2008

Kill the One with the Ball, or How I learned to Love Capitalism

For many of us, preparation for real life happened not in the classroom, but on the playground at recess. There's a lot to be learned about Capitalism from the bottom of a schoolyard pig-pile.


Sunday, March 9 2008

Get on the Bus: A Tutorial for the US Presidential Candidates

While it may be noisy, cramped, and crowded with voices that sound nothing like the candidates', every bus is a microcosm America -- and a perfect place to really meet "the people".


Sunday, February 10 2008

Say It Ain’t So, Senator

Concerned that steroids will ruin baseball? Perhaps there's a greater threat to the game: Congress.


Sunday, January 13 2008

The Mean Streets of Public Television

Oscar the Grouch and Miss Piggy roll up their sleeves for this latest battle in the culture wars: the controversial lyrics of "Elmo's Song".


Tuesday, December 11 2007

Hypocrisy: It’s What’s for Dinner

Why does the pardoning of a turkey warrant extensive media coverage in the US, while Presidential pardons of humans are a page seven story, at best?


Sunday, November 11 2007

Splitting Hairs with the US Government

How many citizens must be victimized by a $400 haircut before a Presidential candidate offers up a Universal Hair Care program?


Wednesday, October 17 2007

Stick It to ‘Em: The Art of Political Cartoons

As the adage goes, no matter who you vote for, the government wins; each party offers ample fodder for both poignant exception to policies and amusing examination of principles.


Sunday, September 16 2007

Mass-Debating: A Better Method

A Presidential Spelling Bee is the perfect forum for a pre-primary debate. Which candidate can overcome a grueling series of 11-letter words and be crowned the champion, and which will insist there are two 'u's in nuclear?


Sunday, August 19 2007

Barbeque: The New Environmental Battleground

Bart Simpson urges, “Don’t have a cow!” As the climate warms, I beg to differ.


Monday, July 16 2007

Make Love, Not War? Why Not Have It Both Ways?

Dropping a "gay bomb" on enemy soldiers might prove to distract them, yes, but these incapacitants, though no less harsh, will make the enemy forget what they were ever fighting for.


Sunday, June 10 2007

Smokey and the Bandit

To borrow a buzz phrase from earlier this decade, if the President stops dancing the malaria dance, the terrorists will win.


Sunday, May 13 2007

Navigating America with the Help of Don Imus

OpStar: part talk radio / part OnStar vehicle guidance system for those who are easily confused by the squiggly red and blue lines on paper maps.


Sunday, April 22 2007

Seeking: President. Must love balanced budgets, cats.

It's time the US graduated from the Electoral College and took advantage of the latest election technology: eHarmony's patented Compatibility Matching System.


Sunday, March 18 2007

The Proof is in the Progeny

Each child named with a presidential surname is in fact a living memorial to that president. So if we count these living memorials, we'll know who the best US presidents really were.


Sunday, February 18 2007

But I Wanted the Catfish!

No industry in America so readily -- even eagerly -- treats conjecture with the same value as fact as political commentary.


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