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25 and 30 June

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Grown Ups

Director: Dennis Dugan
Cast: Adam Sandler, Kevin James, Chris Rock, David Spade, Rob Schneider, Salma Hayek, Maria Bello, Maya Rudolph
25 June
Grown Ups


Adam Sandler tried to expand his always limited range with 2009’s serio-comic Funny People. Writer/director Judd Apatow let him and the rest of the fanbase down with his wildly uneven excuse for self-indulgence. Now the artist formerly known as The Stud Boy is back in familiar farce waters, with longtime directing buddy Dennis Dugan behind the camera, and a wealth of comic buddies (David Spade, Chris Rock, Kevin James, Rob Schneider) in front. The basic premise has five guys getting together upon the death of their former basketball coach to spend the Fourth of July reminiscing and acting idiotic. Sandler always excels at stunted juvenilia, and from all indications, this movie is loaded with same.


 

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Knight and Day

Director: James Mangold
Cast: Tom Cruise, Cameron Diaz, Maggie Grace, Paul Dano, Marc Blucas, Viola Davis, Olivier Martinez
25 June
Knight and Day


Tom Cruise has spent so much time demanding to be taken “seriously” that when he wants to break out and lift things up a bit, he can come off as forced and unfunny. Unless he’s covered in pounds of latex smarm, it’s hard to see him as lighthearted. In this case, our hero is a covert agent who accidentally gets his blind date (Cameron Diaz? You mean she can’t find a man on her own?) mixed up in his comic caper shenanigans. There is potential here, especially with James Mangold guiding the action. But there’s still the patina of implausibility with Cruise. Give him a somber future shock scenario and he’s golden. Move into more mainstream storylines and he just doesn’t fit.


 

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The Twilight Saga: Eclipse

Director: David Slade
Cast: Kristen Stewart, Robert Pattinson, Taylor Lautner, Bryce Dallas Howard, Billy Burke, Dakota Fanning
30 June
The Twilight Saga: Eclipse


Do you really need to know that this latest incarnation of the Stephanie Meyer mega-money movie merchandizing behemoth is about to hit theaters, a mere eight months after New Moon mopped up the competition? Don’t you already have every element of this unnecessary neckbiter B.S. memorized and ripe for regurgitation? Don’t you realize that a decade from now people will be laughing at your love for this Anne Rice-lite lameness the same way they snicker at fans of O-Town? As the angst between human, diamond skinned vampire, and hunky werewolf builds, the final film in the series is already in production. Guess it’s only a matter of time before all this Team twaddle dries up and dissipates. Hurray!


Since deciding to employ his underdeveloped muse muscles over five years ago, Bill has been a significant staff member and writer for three of the Web's most influential websites: DVD Talk, DVD Verdict and, of course, PopMatters. He also has expanded his own web presence with Bill Gibron.com a place where he further explores creative options. It is here where you can learn of his love of Swindon's own XTC, skim a few chapters of his terrifying tome in the making, The Big Book of Evil, and hear samples from the cassette albums he created in his college music studio, The Scream Room.


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