+ Interview with Orlando Jones, starring in The Replacements
+ another review of The Replacements by America Billy
Union Busting
There are lots of reasons to feel good while you're
watching The Replacements. There's Keanu Reeves
running across a football field, his hair flopping
slow motionly-perfectly in the breeze. There's Gene
Hackman as the coach, glowering until he smiles
ever-so-slightly, showing that one-two punch of
affability and intensity for which he is so justly
revered. And there's the usual football-movie footage
interspersed with the usual fan and coach and owner
reaction shots, cheerleaders in cute red outfits, and
guy-bonding scenes galore, by fisticuffs and comic
hijinks. Yes indeed, on the feel-good front, this
movie would seem to have it all.
But there's something else in The Replacements that
doesn't feel so great: a giddily incongruous
anti-union politics. It's one thing to make movie
heroes out of everymen characters: common
entertainment industry wisdom has it that in viewers
want to see underdogs win and villains (say, obscenely
rich professional sports team owners) get theirs. It's
another thing to make villains out of union players by
aligning them with those rich owners. Certainly, few
regular joe viewers will think that union players with
multi-million dollar contracts and endorsement deals
are underpaid: fans' generally negative responses to
recent pro sports players' strikes in baseball and
basketball have made this point abundantly clear. But
even if all this is true, The Replacements'
particular spin on the relationship between unions and
management is simplistic and, more often than not,
spurious.
It didn't need to be that way. The plot commences with
a droll commentary on the peculiar relations among
celebrity, ambition, and masculinity. Former Ohio
State star quarterback Shane Falco (Reeves) is working
his day job, which is scraping accumulated crap off
the bottoms of wealthy people's boats. While
underwater, he espies a football-shaped trophy
half-buried in the sand, picks it up and mimes a pass,
all still underwater, the sand swirling and the
darkness all around him. It's a cute and resonant
image, evoking the past as something buried and
blurred, glories now slightly decelerated and
distorted in memory. And for a minute, it appears that
you're watching a movie with some original wit, some
perspective on sports heroes and rituals, some sense
of itself as a genre film.
But no. From this moment on, The Replacements
descends into a deep sea of clichés and stereotypes.
Shane, it turns out, is reliving his glory days with a
certain ruefulness, because he blew his chance at the
pros during a famous Sugar Bowl, when he froze and his
team lost, very badly. To provide for his redemption,
Vince McKewan's script based loosely on the 1987
real life NFL strike sets up a loony-tunes
situation. And this is: the Washington Sentinels
organization, poised to get into the playoffs when the
regular team goes on strike, assembles a scab team to
win three out of four remaining season games, so that
the regular team can return and go for the gold (or
whatever it is they go for at the Superbowl). This
plot is set in motion by the Sentinels' avaricious
owner, Edward O'Neil (Jack Warden), who has his own
manhood issues, namely, a boozy wife who doesn't
understand him. O'Neil hires another guy with issues,
an ex-pro-coach with a mysterious fiasco in his past,
Jimmy McGinty (Hackman).
By all appearances, Jimmy is determined to employ men
who might benefit from a second chance. Shane is an
obvious example, though at the time Jimmy approaches
him, he doesn't know that; to the contrary, he's under
the ridiculous impression that he's happy in his
unfootballed, unpressured, relatively demasculinized
life. But Shane and his fellow recruits quickly accept
the notion that they might reclaim their "lost"
self-esteem by reclaiming their "lost" manhood.
Specifically, the scab team is comprised of guys who
almost made it and guys who never played the game in
their lives, for instance, a sumo wrestler (Ace
Yunomine) who eats raw eggs before game and pukes on
the field: how comical is that? The rest of the motley
lineup includes butter-fingered receiver Clifford
Franklin (Orlando Jones), ex-SWAT jarhead Danny (Jon
Favreau), closed-mouthed con Earl (Michael Jace),
scrawny soccer player/kicker (Rhys Ifans), a deaf kid
named Brian Murphy (David Denman), and two burly
brothers working as rap-star bodyguards, Andre
(Michael Taliferro) and Jamal (Faizon Love). It goes
without saying that when characters can be described
in such reductive terms, there's not much room for
"development."
How ironic then, that what appears to be at stake in
The Replacements is a kind of identity. For most of
the players, it's a rather straight-ahead masculine
identity, the kind that you achieve when you earn
trophies, crush skulls, hear crowds roar, or, in the
case of Shane, you win the girl, hardworking Sentinels
cheerleader Annabelle (Melrose Place's Brooke
Langton). Shane and Jimmy bond immediately, because
they're the film's stars and because they share a
similar identity issue, that is, they want to be
redeemed for their past perceived failures (losing
football games). Or, as Jimmy puts it in a closing
voice-over, they want to gain that sense of
"greatness" which, "no matter how brief, stays with a
man." But Jimmy's inspiring observation isn't really
what The Replacements' focus; it's more like an
afterthought he lobs at viewers when the credits roll,
so viewers can leave the theater feeling good even
though the scab team whether they win or lose
will be back to their old lives as soon as the last
game is done. This is, after all, what it means to be
replacements: you are, in a word, temporary.
The movie's real focus is not on reclaiming that
particular (and frankly depressing) identity.
Remember: it wants you feel good. So The Replacments
gives you a team to root for, the scabs (granted,
they're very nice scabs). And to make them palatable,
the film offers a singular villain who's self-obsessed
and hateful. The Sentinels' regular quarterback, Eddie
(Brett Cullen) apparently has nothing better to do
with his time than hang around the stadium all day,
order his large, black, ruffian teammates to turn over
Shane's working-man's pickup truck, and yell malicious
epithets at the replacement players as they go to work
each day. The fact that Eddie owns a privileged-man's
Porsche (which Shane's compatriots, the bodyguard
brothers, shoot in retaliation), or that O'Neil
wants him to come back for the final game, only makes
Eddie more heinous (and how a union player ends up on
the same side as the owner is one of the film's
mysteries). Add to this Eddie's long ago seduction and
abandonment of the lovely Annabelle, and you have the
complete scoundrel, in urgent need of come-uppance.
Because this tired rivalry between Good Shane and Bad
Eddie will not engage anyone's interest for an hour
and a half, The Replacements fills in with the
secondary, "comic" characters, defined by their race
and/or class and/or disability (in the case of the
deaf kid). They put their faith in Shane, bond in a
bar fight with the union players, sing and dance to "I
Will Survive," and play ferocious football while their
female counterparts, a crew of
strippers-turned-scab-cheerleaders, make skanky moves
on the sidelines. (So lascivious is their performance
that male football fans' jaws drop and female fans
cover their children's eyes.) No matter how bloodied
and frustrated the replacements get on the field, they
come back again and again, for more... something. They
are becoming men.
The movie offers predictably smarmy sportscasters'
narration for this evolution, by John Madden and Pat
Summerall ("The Washington Sentinels are playing like
there's no tomorrow, and for them, there isn't!"). The
very fact of their schtick highlights the
who's-in-bed-with-whom politics of the pro football
industry (it's a crass commercial venture, tv networks
orchestrate team schedules, rich owners stay rich,
etc., etc.). But what they have to say never offers
much in the way of actual humor or insight. I couldn't
help but wonder how different The Replacements might
have been had Dennis Miller been commentating.