THE CULT OF PERSONALITY
by Devon Powers
PopMatters Concert Editor
In the late 1970s, Gary Wilson was 24 years old and
living in the basement of his parents' house in
Endicott, NY. Having already dabbled in a number of
local bands and with a failed
"I'm-moving-to-NYC-to-be-a-rock star" attempt under
his belt, Gary turned the basement into a recording
studio and in 1977 self-released a 12-track album of
experimental music, entitled You Think You Really
Know Me. The record, perhaps expectedly, tanked.
"It was hard to get interest in my music", says
Wilson, who tried to garner supporters by mailing the
album to radio stations and music critics nationwide.
Despite the commercial disappointment, Gary did
develop his own fan base, as rabid as it was small. At
Washington's Evergreen State College, for instance,
the radio station KAOS became an active promoter of
Gary's songs, featuring one on every radio program for
years. But that was pretty much it for Gary Wilson.
Seemingly destined to live the ordinary lifestyle of a
not-even-close celebrity, Gary ceased recording in
1981 and, for all intents and purposes, vanished.
But Gary seemed destined to make it somehow, and this
year, more than twice the age he was when he made his
album, he's also enjoying one more shot at the career
he missed back in the 1970s. After hearing his music,
representatives from Motel Records went on a hunt for
Gary Wilson, and begged him to reissue You Think
You Really Know Me with them. And he did! Gary
even consented to playing live dates in order to
promote the material, recently doing a gig at the
legendary Joe's Pub in New York City. His moment to
shine, it seemed, had finally come.
The Gary Wilson story has all the trappings of a fairy
tale, right? The musician with a dream and heart, but
no listeners, finally gets his shot at stardom. The
record, a jewel destined to be lost in the shuffle,
finally gets the exposure it deserves. Fate, I tell
you, fate! Justice, the sweet smell of justice! It's
enough to make you go back to church, to believe in a
thing called destiny and, dammit, to give yourself
wholeheartedly into the goodness of the All-American
Dream.
Don't go calling Oprah or waving the stars and stripes
just yet, though, as I've omitted a few details. Let's
start first with Gary's influences, which range from
the Rolling Stones to John Cage. Yes, you read those
correctly. Next, his sound: synthesizer-steeped,
toying with the sensual schmaltz-posturing of a Barry
Manilow or Bobby Rydell, over the sounds of water
running, glass breaking, machines malfunctioning. Add
to this a quick survey of song titles ("Groovy Girls
Make Out at the Beach", "Chromium Bitch") and lyrics
("What you trying to do, put me on a sick trip or
something?"; "Your mind is so imbalanced / I don't
care if they call you a whore / Whoo!"). Did I mention
that Gary sent along pictures with his albums --
pictures of him covered in magnetic tape, pictures
where plastic bags draped his face underneath his
sunglasses, pictures where much of his body was
splattered with paint? Did I tell you that he often
made music while covered in baking flour because, as
he says it "reminds me of snow?" Oh, and despite
having hardly anyone listen to his album, you likely
have heard those influenced by his sound -- for
instance, Beck, who even cites Gary in one of his
songs? ( "Where It's At" -- "passin' the dutchie /
from coast to coast / like my man Gary Wilson / rocks
the most".)
Ahh, Gary Wilson. For the performer who is as much
performance artist as he is lounge act, a pat fairy
tale simply will not do. His fade into obscurity came
largely because no one could understand his music;
today, it still sounds light years ahead of its time
and maybe not even of this planet. More than that,
You Think You Really Know Me is a record you
can't believe someone actually made -- its sounds are
just plain weird, its subject matter embarrassingly
private, and its creator nearly incomprehensible.
This is a dare: anyone who thinks that they've heard
it all, that nothing musically can floor them, need
only listen to the crown jewel of You Think You
Really Know Me, a jazzed-out number entitled "6.4
= Make Out". It's the kind of song that a person could
only write just before, just after, or maybe during
masturbation. Gary's tense, electrified, sex-starved
vocals hang tactilely above soulful synth, which is
interrupted in parts by what sounds like thunder
claps, in others by gentle, almost angelic tinkling.
"How old did you say you were?" Gary asks, as he winds
a fantasy of attempting to seduce the object of his
desires. "Sixteen", calls out one of his band mates,
to which Gary answers "Did I ever tell you, I've got a
real crush on Karen?"
The album banks largely on this sort of teenage sexual
crisis, most of the songs about making out, girls with
red lips, and having crushes -- and not just on Karen.
"C-I-N-D-Y spells Cindy / And she's a groovy chick",
Gary sing-speaks. "And when you want to kiss her lips
/ She'll tell you it would be real cool with her". And
yes, Cindy and Karen are real people. "Most of them
probably don't even know I sing about them", Wilson
says. "Even with my girlfriend Bernadette, I find it
awkward to sing a song for her or to a girl".
Which may explain why, during his recent live
performance in New York City, Gary sang his songs to a
mannequin, a naked black-haired thing which he fondled
as his vocals quivered with their signature
pre-orgasmic warble. Backing him were a gaggle of
players, like Robert Palmer's ladies but men,
uniformly dressed and wearing sunglasses. Throughout
the show, which was composed of almost the entirety of
You Think You Really Know Me, the lights
oscillated in screwball colors, video streamed of
furry things being beaten against speakers, and a man
kept entering the stage with a bag of flour,
sprinkling Gary as he sang on his knees or did Hail
Marys.
Gary had aged -- receding hairline, graying ponytail
-- but the material sounded as fresh and modern as it
does on the record, and 25 years did nothing to temper
Gary's proclivity for peculiarity and pathos. Opening
the night with "I Wanna Lose Control" -- two minutes
of up-tempo sleaze -- Gary's singing sounded even more
desperate than it does on record. "I wanna lose
control for about 15 minutes", Gary crooned,
donning light jeans, a black blazer and no shirt that
were leagues away from the svelte, skinny tie look he
sported in the 1970s. "And then I'll feel real cool
for the rest of the night". He had reason to feel real
cool -- the artist had sold out two back-to-back
shows, which drew hoards of indie hipsters as well as
members of his long-time cult of fans.
The album's title track, "You Think You Really Know
Me", is possibly the key to cracking the mystery of
Wilson. On the album, it's a short cacophony of noise
-- rhythmless drums and cymbal hits, beeping and
keyboards, found noises that whir, crash, and buzz
while Gary speaks robotically, repeatedly "you think
you really know me?" Gary performed this on the
ground, like the song was his death or birth, as his
backing musicians reveled in going apeshit on guitars,
beating the drums when they felt so moved, and filling
the venue with feedback. There may be a thousand Gary
Wilsons in the world, but don't think you really
know this one. Gary Wilson is like no one else.
Though somewhere deep inside all of us, there's a
little bit of this particular Gary Wilson. It's the
person who still lusts after that high school
sweetheart or penned tormented love songs for an
unrequited crush. It's the part that howled, like an
injured animal, at the devastating bruises caused by
teenage rejection, or worse. And it's the untamed soul
we bury deep, fearful of being misunderstood and
equally fearful of being taken seriously. Gary Wilson
has made sure that these parts don't starve in the pit
of our souls or waste away in our diaries. He's
projected them, not once but twice, into the world;
and for heaven or hell's sake, we owe it to ourselves
to listen. Once we do, as Gary puts it, "we'll see
what happens".
3 June 2002