Lowbrow Literati

The Matrix: I Have No Mouth and I Must Scream

[7.Jan.10] :. If the first act of The Matrix calls to mind eXistenZ, with Pikel licking Allegra’s bio-port and sucking gristle and skin from a gun, its third act is as antiseptic as a bad Star Trek rerun.

Are We All Mythtaken About Star Wars?

[25.Nov.09] :. Fans are mistaken about Return of the Jedi and Luke Skywalker (dismissing the Ewoks, and Skywalker is deemed a wuss). Might they also be wrong about the prequel trilogy? And how.

The Ghostbusters Twinkie Defense

[2.Nov.09] :. More surprising than the still-impressive special effects and the jokes that hold up to modern scrutiny is the fact that there are moments throughout Ghostbusters that are legitimately scary.

New Kids on the Block: Hangin’ Tough, Refusing to Let Go

[8.Oct.09] :. In 1989, I loathed the New Kids on the Block with a passion and intensity that only junior high-aged children can bring to their study of popular culture, yet when Hangin’ Tough Live hit DVD, I had to see it.

G.I. Joe’s Future Hangs on the Unbalanced

[26.Aug.09] :. The fate of 'The Rise of Cobra' (both the toys and the movie) might depend on something completely out of Hasbro’s control: nostalgia.

Let the Kayfabe be Unbroken: My Breakfast with Blassie

[16.Jul.09] :. This movie provokes a guilty-pleasure curiosity, followed by a yearning to somehow feel above the ridiculous performance you’re witnessing.

Truth Against Truth: The Work of Adrian Tomine

[7.Jul.09] :. Tomine has a gift for capturing body language and facial expressions -- his characters often say more in a silent panel than most say with an entire word balloon.

Footnotes in the Great Book of Gummi

[7.Jun.09] :. Still cute, funny and entertaining, Disney’s Adventures of the Gummi Bears holds up remarkably well on every level.

Metal Up Yours, Mine & Metallica’s

[6.May.09] :. Metallica’s got identity and projection issues -- James Hetfield repeatedly directs a string of insights or even accusations at some mysterious "you", only to concede by song's end that he is talking to himself.

Looking Back at ‘Back to the Future’

[9.Apr.09] :. The most irreverent, knowing, daring and hippest time travel story of all time has, inevitably and fittingly, become a time capsule.

Metabots and Deconstructicons: Transformers Goes Postmodern

[29.Jan.09] :. I am happy to report that after 25 years, the 'Transformers' franchise has finally gone postmodern… no thanks to 'Transformers Energon'.

Bret Hart: A Real Life in a Cartoon World

[8.Jan.09] :. In a surreal world dedicated to a uniquely haphazard and comically inept breed of pretense, Bret Hart’s appeal was simple: he made everything seem 'real'.

There Was No Way to Tell This Man Was a Monster

[1.Dec.08] :. Scott Keith's Dungeon of Death is a confused, unfocused, meandering account of the most gruesome death yet in an industry known for killing off its performers at startlingly young ages.

From a Fluid Culture to a Culture of Steam: Alan Moore

[21.Nov.08] :. For all the self-serious Deep Thoughts and the sometimes unsettling material in DeZ Vylenz The Mindscape of Alan Moore, Moore can be a startlingly funny host.

Galaxy Rangers: No Guts, No Glory, No Clue

[3.Sep.08] :. Having missed out on the show in its '80s heyday, a hapless Monte Williams shares his thoughts during his baffled first look at The Galaxy Rangers.

The Incredible Hulk: Madly in Anger with You

[13.Jun.08] :. With The Incredible Hulk ripping through movie screens in mind, Williams hunkers down on the couch with two silly, strangely stirring seasons of the TV show.

We Dream We’re the People in Songs

[22.Apr.08] :. Is he strumming your face with his fingers? And singing your life with his words?

Whitewash

[31.Mar.08] :. A small town white boy looks back at pop culture's impact on his concept of race while growing up, and how racism and homophobia are expressed and addressed in today's pop climate.

Missing Places I’ve Never Been: A Love Letter to Alex Ross

[25.Feb.08] :. The appeal, the madness of Ross' painting is that it makes a scene involving a fight between spandex-clad do-gooders seem almost as important as Rockwell's depiction of the first step to end racial segregation.

How Far Will A Man Go for G.I. Joe?

[18.Dec.07] :. Sigma 666: Wherein I offer my soul to Satan in exchange for G.I. Joe dolls.

Godless

[7.Nov.07] :. I'm not here to mock God and his fanatical fan club, I'll sit back and let much more clever men and women mock them for me.

Autobiographigure: The Courageous Quest for a Toy in One’s Own Image

[10.Oct.07] :. The shelves of our great nation's toy retailers are seldom stocked with action figures of flabby, furry, graying columnists, but that could change . . .

Where Gods and Monsters Watch Over Me

[6.Sep.07] :. My DVDs and books and toys are so seductive, and the outside world so unappealing, that it's sometimes all I can do to force myself to walk out the front door every morning.

By the Power of Softcore

[6.Aug.07] :. One Man's Daring Look Back at He-Man and the Masters of the Universe… and Porky's

Transformers: Autobotic Asphyxiation

[3.Jul.07] :. Autobotic Asphyxiation occurs when someone crosses that thin, tremulous line separating a passionate hobby from an unhealthy obsession. Watch for these symptoms . . .

Who Will Watch the Watchmen?

[6.Jun.07] :. To reduce Watchmen to just another superhero movie is to miss the point entirely, and one can't help but anticipate that the result will have all the cultural relevance of a supermarket paperback novelization of Citizen Kane.

Lose Your Delusion: An Open Letter to William ‘Axl’ Rose of Guns N’ Roses

[7.May.07] :. A disillusioned fan calls for the resurrection of Guns N' Roses, already. Please. Now would be good.

A Miscarriage of Justice: The WWE and Political Campaigning

[29.Mar.07] :. The time has come to admit to ourselves that young America's polite indifference towards partisan politics and the wrestling industry stems from the uncomfortable but increasingly undeniable fact that the two have grown indistinguishable from one another.

Toys ‘n the Addict

[12.Mar.07] :. As wild-eyed Rob (John Cusack), in High Fidelity, explains that his chaotic collection of LPs is not organized alphabetically, nor chronologically, but autobiographically, so, too, many toy collectors amass and display their plastic trinkets in an effort to compile something of a three-dimensional, pop cultural autobiography.

The Red Envelope Held Sway Over All

[15.Feb.07] :. Practically everyone in Boonville loathes Wal-Mart and Home Depot, and yet despite its role in the loss of two local independent businesses, Netflix has been granted a rare and elusive "Get Out of Our Smug Disapproval Free" card.

Wish or Wishout You

[22.Jan.07] :. Move over, MySpace, Amazon.com's 'who you are is what you buy' Wish List is the new hip virtual community.