The Mummy: Tomb of the Dragon Emperor

Director: Rob Cohen

Cast: Brendan Fraser, Jet Li, Maria Bello, John Hannah, Luke Ford, Michelle Yeoh, Isabella Leong

(Universal Pictures; US: 1 Aug 2008; UK: 6 Aug 2008)

Official Site

1 August
In the Center Ring
The Mummy: Tomb of the Dragon Emperor

Just what we needed to start August off with a bang—another mindless sequel of this incessantly silly franchise, only this time around, two key components are totally missing. Steve Sommers, the man behind the whole Mummy movie marathon, is off making his big screen adaptation of GI Joe (oh joy!) and an Oscar has given co-star Rachel Weisz the industry spunk to say “nyet” to another round of this ridiculousness. While the Asian angle may make this a more palatable outing than the whole Scorpion King debacle, director Rob Cohen’s recent track record—The Skulls, Stealth, The Fast and the Furious, xXx - suggests otherwise. It used to be that August was the dregs of the summer season, a place where studios put their destined to underperform losers. Looks like this bandaged bad boy is following in the footsteps of old time Hollywood.

Choke

Director: Clark Gregg

Cast: Sam Rockwell, Anjelica Huston, Kelly Macdonald

(Fox Searchlight; US: 1 Aug 2008)

1 August
The Outer Circles
Choke

It may not be Fight Club (and frankly, what can be), but Chuck Palahniuk’s novel about a sex addicted swindler who uses the title malady to pry money out of unfortunate restaurant marks could be this year’s underground smash. A resounding success at Sundance, where the Hollywood Reporter declared it “an extreme post-modern fairytale”, this has cult favorite stamped all over it. Sam Rockwell and Anjelica Huston give knockout performances, and the entire tone is part social commentary, part twisted fantastical farce. Sounds like the perfect combination for a cynical, Generation Hex audience.

Midnight Meat Train

Director: Ryuhei Kitamura

Cast: Bradley Cooper, Vinnie Jones, Leslie Bibb, Brooke Shields, Roger Bart

(Lionsgate; US: 1 Aug 2008)

1 August
The Outer Circles
Midnight Meat Train

Clive Barker’s terrifying tale of a serial killer stalking the New York subway system has a lot of cinematic potential. There’s the blood and guts element to be sure, but the story also centers on a down on his luck photographer, and the desperate need to make a name for himself in the city’s art community. Helmed by Ryuhei Kitamuram, the moviemaking madman behind the Japanese zombie criminal gorefest Versus, the combination of atmosphere and offal signals some solid urban scares. While Barker is an acquired literary taste, his fright films have typically been pretty good. We’re keeping our fingers crossed.

1 August
Sneaking in Under the Tent
He’s Just Not That Into You

A sophisticated comedy based on a self-help book? Sadder still, the cast is made up of some solid performers like Jennifer Connelly, Ben Affleck, Drew Barrymore, and Scarlett Johansson. Indeed, in our esteem addicted society where nothing is personal and everything is excused, using some idiots dating tool as a way of creating a series of serio-witty vignettes smacks of creative desperation. Now imagine the mind looking forward to this film. Yikes!

Swing Vote

Director: Joshua Michael Stern

Cast: Kevin Costner, Madeline Carroll, Paula Patton, Dennis Hopper, Kelsey Grammer, Stanley Tucci, George Lopez,

(Touchstone Films; US: 1 Aug 2008; UK: 26 Sep 2008)

Official Site

1 August
Sneaking in Under the Tent
Swing Vote

Kevin Costner is a beer swilling bumpkin who learns that the entire Presidential election comes down to his one vote. Right. Apparently, the Electoral College, the Supreme Court, and the entire population of the United States get split 50/50, leaving Almost Larry the Cable Guy as the determinator in chief. We’re laughing already. Unfortunately, it’s not with the film, but at it. Definitely AT it.

The Rocker

Director: Peter Cattaneo

Cast: Rainn Wilson, Christina Applegate, Teddy Geiger, Josh Gad, Will Arnett, Emma Stone

(Fox Atomic; US: 20 Aug 2008; UK: 22 Aug 2008)

1 August
Sneaking in Under the Tent
The Rocker

Rainn Wilson gets a starring vehicle as an ex-’80s hair band member who uses his nephew’s high school rock outfit as a means of restarting his career. There’s a great deal of potential here, especially when you take into consideration that The Full Monty‘s Peter Cattaneo is behind the camera, and it was written by Wallace Wolodarsky (of The Simpsons) and Maya Forbes (of The Larry Sanders Show). Now if they can just get the decade-defining music right.

Pineapple Express

Director: David Gordon Green

Cast: Seth Rogen, James Franco, Danny McBride, Amber Heard, Rosie Perez, Gary Cole, Craig Robinson, Kevin Corrigan, Bill Hader

(Columbia Pictures ; US: 6 Aug 2008; UK: 12 Sep 2008)

Official Site

8 August
In the Center Ring
Pineapple Express

Talk about a pre-emptive push. Message boards have been waxing prophetic about this film since Superbad started its Cineplex domination. As stoner comedies go, this one has a decided dark edge…one amplified by the presence of George Washington/Snow Angels‘ David Gordon Green in the director’s chair. Star Seth Rogen once again scripted with Evan Goldberg (with Freaks and Geeks buddy Judd Apatow adding a story credit), and rumor has it that Mr. Knocked Up was supposed to play the role that James Franco is now essaying. But because everyone’s favorite Spidey supporter was so hilarious in slacker mode, the parts were switched. The current trailer looks like Cheech and Chong Piss Off the Wrong Guys, and the violence seems almost antithetical to the whole pot approach. Still, if anyone can pull this off, it would be this cocky creative team. Their track record speaks for itself.

The Sisterhood of the Traveling Pants 2

Director: Sanaa Hamri

Cast: Alexis Bledel, America Ferrera, Blake Lively, Amber Tamblyn, Jesse Williams, Rachel Nichols, Blythe Danner, Kyle MacLachlan

(Warner Brothers; US: 6 Aug 2008)

Official Site

8 August
Sneaking in Under the Tent
The Sisterhood of the Traveling Pants 2

You know the old joke: this sequel was clearly needed to address all the issues that were raised and yet unresolved at the end of Part One. Number two guarantees more laughs, more tears, and more well-worn dungarees. Online excitement among in-the-known tweens is high, so who knows. This could be one of those unimpressive pictures that still makes the studio a pile of money. It could also fade away without anyone really noticing.

Hell Ride

Director: Larry Bishop

Cast: Larry Bishop , Michael Madsen, Dennis Hopper , Eric Balfour , Vinnie Jones, Leonor Varela , Kanin J. Howell , Michael Beach

(Dimension Films; US: 8 Aug 2008)

8 August
Sneaking in Under the Tent
Hell Ride

Back in 1996, writer/director Larry Bishop concocted one of the worst films of all time, the mob mess known as Mad Dog Time. Now, over a decade later, he’s back with a Quentin Tarantino approved bow to the biker epic called Hell Ride…and early reviews are equally uncomplimentary. He probably never realized how hard it would be to recreate the sleazoid sensation of ‘70s grindhouse fodder. His Executive Producer could have helped him out with that insight.

Tropic Thunder

Director: Ben Stiller

Cast: Ben Stiller, Jack Black, Robert Downey, Jr., Steve Coogan, Brandon T. Jackson, Jay Baruchel, Danny McBride, Nick Nolte

(Paramount Pictures; US: 13 Aug 2008; UK: 19 Sep 2008)

Official Site

15 August
In the Center Ring
Tropic Thunder

It’s probably the Summer’s biggest gamble, a crazy comedy in which one of the main characters surgically changes his RACE to play an African American Vietnam war vet. Robert Downey Jr.’s Method blackface routine has already got publicity machines percolating, and the rest of the narrative—centering on a group of actors who inexplicably wind up fighting like real soldiers—sounds like Three Amigos mixed with Platoon. Ben Stiller’s name on both the directing and screenplay credits may alleviate some of the qualms. His work behind the lens is usually more solid than the frequently flailing he does in front. And let’s not forget the Tom Cruise cameo that had the famed Scientologist up in arms when the secret was revealed. Of course, no one really cares if he’s playing a fat, balding idiot. Some may consider it typecasting—or at the very least, karma.

Star Wars: Clone Wars

Director: Dave Filoni

Cast: Terrence "T.C." Carson, Anthony Daniels, Matthew Wood, Tom Kane, Grey DeLisle

(Warner Brothers; US: 15 Aug 2008)

Official Site

15 August
In the Center Ring
Star Wars: Clone Wars

Oh no, here he goes again. Using the already tired medium of CGI, George Lucas is giving fervent fans even more Star Wars revisionism. This time out, we are linking the second prequel (Attack of the Clones) with the horrid last part of the opening trilogy (Revenge of the Sith). Sadly, it seems like any semblance of imagination or invention the franchise had to offer is being sapped away by lame animation and an even worse marketing ideal. Apparently, it’s all a set up for a TV series to start in the Fall. Even longtime diehards are starting to see the man’s money-oriented approach to his legacy. The action oriented trailer (quickly yanked off YouTube after appearing briefly), indicates that everyone associated with this folly believes that an excess of eye candy is all you need to make a movie. At least there will now be an excuse for the horribly unnatural mannerisms of Anakin Skywalker.

Towelhead

Director: Alan Ball

Cast: Summer Bishil, Aaron Eckhart, Peter Macdissi, Toni Collette, Maria Bello, Matt Letscher

(Warner Indie; US: 15 Aug 2008)

15 August
Sneaking in Under the Tent
Towelhead

Alan Ball’s Oscar for American Beauty remains a well deserved screenplay win. It stands as one of the most insightful looks at suburban malaise this side of Joe Sarno. What he knows about the Arab experience in these United States is questionable at best. Apparently, this film about a sexually frustrated young Lebanese girl has been getting a lot of uncomplimentary buzz for the teen promiscuity angle. Oddly enough, the racial element is not a problem.

Mirrors

Director: Alexandre Aja

Cast: Kiefer Sutherland, Paula Patton, Cameron Boyce, Amy Smart , Erika Gluck

(Fox; US: 15 Aug 2008)

Official Site

15 August
Sneaking in Under the Tent
Mirrors

Alexandre Aja burst onto the horror landscape with his landmark effort Haute Tension. While some hated the slasher redux, the French filmmaker showed a lot of gumption. Even his remake of Wes Craven’s The Hills Have Eyes was inventive and weird. Now comes this take on the Korean movie Into the Mirrors. If he follows the trend set by fellow countrymen David Moreau and Xavier Palud and their appalling The Eye, we’re in for another fear flop.