Quantcast

Call for Music Critics and Music Bloggers

Music
cover art

Keepers of the Carpet

Keepers of the Carpet

(Bi-Fi; US: 14 Oct 2001)

When a band markets itself from the outset as “nerd rock” influenced by Weezer and Nerf Herder you pretty much know what you’re in for. Ames, Iowa’s Keepers of the Carpet don’t disappoint in that respect.


Opening with the punchy “Entitled”, Keepers of the Carpet sets the stage for an album full of angsty tracks that do their best to combine wry humor with a barrage of indie rock guitar riffs. The riffs come across as vintage Weezer while the lyrics, moving from bravado claims of fucking someone’s date and big pimping to a contradictory chorus of social anxiety, balance enough frustrated humor to qualify for the Nerf Herder comparison. Unfortunately, by the time the song ends in Jordan Mayland’s frustrated wails of “I wanna be left alone!” KotC’s power is pretty much spent. On the first track.


Actually, “Entitled” is more or less the exception to the rule on this debut album. While Keepers of the Carpet obviously have some respect for the pop leanings of their inspirations, they don’t have their heroes ability to balance irony on a knife point, and the result is just cheese. Songs like “G.I. Joe” seem to play gleefully in the playground of youthful memories, but on repeated listens they reveal themselves as little more than painfully juvenile.


A part of the problem here is Mayland’s gratingly teenaged, nasal voice. On “Holy Moly!” and “G.I. Joe” it almost seems appropriate, but far and away the worst offender on the disc is “I Love You”. Sung as a duet with the equally annoying Melissa Sorbo, it may be among the most banal indie rock love songs ever recorded. Not that love songs can’t be straightforward, but this schmaltzy track will leave you feeling more cynical than sunny.


The other main problem with Keepers of the Carpet is that only half of the songs seem to be musically realized. If Mayland’s voice is a detriment, he certainly has the ability to turn out some great vocal hooks. But the tracks that feature the most memorable hooks (“Holy Moly!”, “My Frustration”, “Rooftop”) are also the tracks that have the most cut-and-paste musical accompaniment. Likewise, songs like “3/4”, “Her Onion Garden”, and “Girl Next Door” deliver decent enough music but have weaker vocal and lyrical qualities. The only time they get it 100% right is on the final cut, “Falling Star”, when the band trades in the rock for a simple ballad that hits all the right notes by sing nothing more than an earnest and lovely (and not whiny) song.


Whatever the possibilities the band may have, bookended between “Entitled” and “Falling Star” are too many songs that are either too cheesy or too banal for this eponymous debut to get much praise. If you’re willing to skip from song to song looking for singular elements to appreciate, then Keepers of the Carpet will be enough for you. But if you’re looking for a solid, complete album, you’ll have to look elsewhere.

Patrick Schabe is an editor, writer, graphic designer, freelance copyeditor, and digital content manager, depending on the time of day. He has also worked in a gas station, at a smoothie bar, as a low-level accountant, taught college courses online, and cleaned offices, so he considers his current employment a success. Under his unassumed identity, Patrick holds a BA in English -- Creative Writing from Metropolitan State College of Denver and a Master of Social Science with an emphasis in Popular Culture Studies from the University of Colorado. He's currently at work on a first novel and a non-fiction piece on cultural theory. Patrick lives in Littleton, Colorado, with his wife, Jessica, who makes everything worthwhile.


Comments
Now on PopMatters
Call for Music Critics and Music Bloggers (Announcements) [Tue, 3:00 pm]
Bone and Bell Release Second EP (Mixed Media) [Tue, 10:00 am]
Cannes 2012: Day 9 - 'Student' + 'In the Fog' (Notes from the Road) [Tue, 9:00 am]
The 10 Greatest Aspects of the 'Star Wars' Franchise (Short Ends and Leader) [Tue, 8:00 am]
Devil May Cry: HD Collection (Reviews) [Tue, 6:45 am]
The Walkmen: Heaven (Reviews) [Tue, 2:00 am]
  1. The Top 10 Overplayed Songs You Hate by Artists You Love (Sound Affects)
  2. Tea with 'Sherlock': Investigating the Investigators (Features)
  3. Sunk? This 'Battleship' Stunk! (Short Ends and Leader)
  4. Tenacious D: Rize of the Fenix (Reviews)
  5. Top Ten Lost Midwest Punk Singles (Sound Affects)
  6. Like 'Doom', In Heels (Moving Pixels)
  7. 10 Pieces of Cinematic Art That Require Revisiting (Short Ends and Leader)
  8. Punk Rock's Pet Sounds: An Interview with Bomb the Music Industry! (Features)
  9. She's a Rainbow: A Tribute to Donna Summer (Features)
  10. Counterbalance No. 82: U2's 'Achtung Baby' (Sound Affects)
  11. 'Albatross': A Not-So-Weighty Coming-of-Age Meets Mid-Life-Crisis Film (Reviews)
  12. Counterbalance No. 83: The Stooges' 'Fun House' (Sound Affects)
  13. We Will Avenge Them Or… Be Avenged?: The Individual in the US Experience (Features)
  14. The Queen and Her Crayons: An Interview With Donna Summer (Features)
  15. The 10 Greatest Aspects of the 'Star Wars' Franchise (Short Ends and Leader)
  16. The Best Canadian Records of the Year? The Fun Agony of Voting for the Polaris Prize Long List (Sound Affects)
  17. Killer Mike: R.A.P. Music (Reviews)
  18. Early Summer 2012 New Music Playlist (Mixed Media)
  19. Sherlock Holmes, Dirk Gently and the Case of the Eccentric Detective (Columns)
  20. Flash Points: Mommy's Breast, Marriage Equality and Why Chipotle Is King (Features)
  21. Sergio Leone: Something to Do with Death (Columns)
  22. In Support of Supports (Moving Pixels)
  23. Flash Points: Chicks, Sluts and Facebook (Features)
  24. In Defense Of... Rock Radio: A Force in Popular Culture (Columns)
  25. Saint Etienne: Words and Music (Reviews)
  26. The Cult: Choice of Weapon (Reviews)
  27. Garbage: Not Your Kind of People (Reviews)
  28. Willie Nelson: Heroes (Reviews)
  29. 'People's Pornography': The Mundanities of Pornography and Surveillance Culture (Reviews)
  30. Feeling '80s Spirit: Post-Hardcore Punk for the Plastic Generation (Columns)
PM Picks
Music Archive
Announcements
Ratings

10 - The Best of the Best

9 - Very Nearly Perfect

8 - Excellent

7 - Damn Good

6 - Good

5 - Average

4 - Unexceptional

3 - Weak

2 - Seriously Flawed

1 - Terrible

© 1999-2012 PopMatters.com. All rights reserved.
PopMatters.com™ and PopMatters™ are trademarks
of PopMatters Media, Inc.

PopMatters is wholly independently owned and operated.
PopMatters is a member of BUZZMEDIA Music, MOG and Guardian Select.