Holiday horrors come in all cinematic shapes and sizes. Here are ten terrible titles destined to put the "Oh No No," not the "Ho Ho Ho" into your yuletide season.
Christmas -- or, in the more PC vernacular, the holiday which occurs sometime in December -- is supposed to be a celebration of peace on Earth and goodwill to all humanity. Instead, it usually ends up being a nightmare of unbridled commercialism, long retail shopping lines, endless fattening foodstuffs, and a reminder why you don't spend more time with your family the other 364 days/11 months out of the year. It's also a trying time for people suffering with depression, as suicide rates seem to escalate along with partygoers cholesterol and diabetes rates. Part of the problem is entertainment oriented. There are lots of wonderful songs, TV shows, plays, and films which expertly capture the yuletide spirit. But for every classic, for every A Christmas Carol or "White Christmas", there's an 'RXmas or a "Mary, Have You Heard".p
Do you wanna know how bad it can get, cinematically speaking? Well, look no further than the ten choices we've highlighted here. Now, granted, there are other candidates in this cavalcade of crap. Some of them, like the K. Gordon Murray matinee nightmare Santa Claus or the equally repellant Santa Claus Conquers the Martians have been turned into holiday "classics" thanks to outlets like Mystery Science Theater 3000. Similarly, there are dozens of dopey big budget bungles like Christmas with the Kranks, Surviving Christmas, and Jingle all the Way. Picking just one -- and we did so here -- allowed us to include both more - and less - conventional fare. Of course, if we've picked on your favorite, we're sorry. On the other hand, if you're jonesing for your annual viewing of, say, the number four selection on our list, you're destined for coal in the holiday stocking anyway.
So, without further angel harking, here are the 10 Worst Christmas/Holiday Movies of all time, beginning with a baffling attempt at a Kris Kringle biopic: